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Singer Tems has shared her view on toxic relationships, pointing out that many people have gone through a kind of love with partners who are unaware of their own toxic behaviour.
“I feel like everyone has experienced that toxic love with someone that doesn’t even know that they’re toxic,” she said, explaining that some people may genuinely think they’re showing love without understanding the emotional effect of their actions.
She added, “They say I love you, I love you, but they don’t realise that they don’t even love you because you can’t truly love someone if you don’t love yourself,” emphasising her belief that self-love must come first before someone can genuinely love another.
According to the singer, what is often mistaken for love can actually be emotional dependence. “I feel like it’s more like they need you or something about you makes them feel a certain way about themselves,” she explained, describing such feelings as temporary rather than real love.
Highlighting her understanding of true affection, Tems said, “Love is not a floating feeling,” pointing out that real love is lasting and shouldn’t be confused with short-lived emotional highs.
She finished by saying that recognizing toxicity can lead to honest conversations and self-reflection, adding that sometimes the best step is to “actually speak to them and see how they’re doing.”
